Three reasons why Germany is the only country in the Eurozone that has its S*%& together

    So many political and international posts... but let me do one more. Germany has avoided the economic and fiscal turmoil that has gripped most of the Eurozone in the wake of the 2008 global crisis. In Greece, the rise of the Neo-Nazi "Golden Dawn" party complicates things in a country traditionally dominated by left-wing parties, but currently run by a center-right one. Furthermore, riots against the very German-funded bailouts that saved the debt-ridden government (the debt-to-GDP ratio currently stands at about 160%, which is not good) are a common occurrence.

Down with the Troika, capitalism, and the government that provides us with the welfare money we use to buy rocks to throw at the police!

     

     The rest of Europe is not doing well either. Spain's unemployment rate stands at 26.6%, and the province of Catalonia continues its efforts to break away from the country. Portugal is in a debt situation similar to that of Greece, and its austerity-oriented government has been rocked by recent scandals. Bailout success stories like that of Ireland are overshadowed by worries about France, which has shifted from Germany's partner in austerity to another nation in fiscal crisis under President Francois Hollande. Even Belgium, the fiscally stable country in which the Capital of the EU is situated, can't seem to do anything but loosen regulations on austerity cuts (considering Belgium is divided into essentially two countries by a linguistic divide, this is the least of their problems- more to come on that later). Successful nations in the EU on their own currency (e.g., Norway, Sweden, Iceland, and other places with blond people who hail from Skyrim) are scurrying away from offers to join the Eurozone like some sort of very quick hamster.
     Europe is in trouble. So why is Germany able to stand its ground?

1. When it comes to left-wing solutions, Germany has been there, and done that

     Often times, left-wing political parties complicate the implementation of effective austerity measures, as in the case of Greece. As I hope you all know, Germany was divided into east and west after WW2 (if you don't know that, then maybe you should quit replaying CoD: World at War and watch a freaking history channel special for once in your life). The fact that the socialist east suffered through debilitating depressions, repression of political freedoms and even food shortages is enough to turn modern Germans away from the more radical leftist solutions; the socialist Die Linke Party (the successor to the East German Party of Democratic Socialism) is currently the smallest party with representation in the Bundestag. This wariness of extremism (which I should note is present toward far-right groups as well) eliminates the confounding variable leftist groups cause in other nations during austerity proposals. In short, the last time the far left was in power, the capital got a giant wall built around it. No one wants that again.

     2. Angela Merkel doesn't mess around

     

     Chancellor Merkel (who I should note holds a Ph.D in Chemistry) is smart as a whip, a career politician and most importantly, doesn't put up with tomfoolery. She's a hardliner, and leads the country during a time when a hardline approach is necessary. I'm not endorsing or criticizing her; all I'm saying is, she's tough. Like a German Margaret Thatcher. Who was the female, British Ronald Reagan. Who was the second most badass President to ever live behind Teddy Roosevelt, who delivered a 90-minute speech while shot. So there you have it. An unwavering character who pushed for austerity when Europe needed a path to stability.

This is not a woman you want to meet in a metaphorical "dark alleyway".

     3. The mainstream parties in Germany cooperate

     The center-right CDU and center-left SPD differ on a few key issues, but underneath it all they share a similar commitment to maintaining the strength of the European community, ensuring Germany's fiscal stability, and above all, guarding against political extremism (Germany actually has an agency, the Bundesamt fuer Verfassungsschutz, that monitors and bans extreme political parties. I don't agree with it, but it demonstrates the strength of the commitment). Cooperation is so widespread that the CDU and SPD actually governed together from 2005-2009, and seem posed to do so again (this is effectively the equivalent of getting the entire House of Representatives to join in a big group hug). This cooperation helps to advance Germany's policy agenda and ensures stability.

     Vielen Dank fuer Euere Aufmerksamkeit! Ich wuensche nur die beste für Deutschland in Zunkunft.

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